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jane eyre(简·爱)-第1部分
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THERE was no possibility of taking a walk that day。 We had been
wandering; indeed; in the leafless shrubbery an hour in the morning;
but since dinner (Mrs。 Reed; when there was no company; dined early)
the cold winter wind had brought with it clouds so sombre; and a
rain so penetrating; that further outdoor exercise was now out of
the question。
I was glad of it: I never liked long walks; especially on chilly
afternoons: dreadful to me was the coming home in the raw twilight;
with nipped fingers and toes; and a heart saddened by the chidings
of Bessie; the nurse; and humbled by the consciousness of my
physical inferiority to Eliza; John; and Georgiana Reed。
The said Eliza; John; and Georgiana were now clustered round
their mama in the drawing…room: she lay reclined on a sofa by the
fireside; and with her darlings about her (for the time neither
quarrelling nor crying) looked perfectly happy。 Me; she had
dispensed from joining the group; saying; 'She regretted to be under
the necessity of keeping me at a distance; but that until she heard
from Bessie; and could discover by her own observation; that I was
endeavouring in good earnest to acquire a more sociable and
childlike disposition; a more attractive and sprightly manner…
something lighter; franker; more natural; as it were… she really
must exclude me from privileges intended only for contented; happy;
little children。'
'What does Bessie say I have done?' I asked。
'Jane; I don't like cavillers or questioners; besides; there is
something truly forbidding in a child taking up her elders in that
manner。 Be seated somewhere; and until you can speak pleasantly;
remain silent。'
A small breakfast…room adjoined the drawing…room; I slipped in
there。 It contained a bookcase: I soon possessed myself of a volume;
taking care that it should be one stored with pictures。 I mounted into
the window…seat: gathering up my feet; I sat cross…legged; like a
Turk; and; having drawn the red moreen curtain nearly close; I was
shrined in double retirement。
Folds of scarlet drapery shut in my view to the right hand; to
the left were the clear panes of glass; protecting; but not separating
me from the drear November day。 At intervals; while turning over the
leaves of my book; I studied the aspect of that winter afternoon。
Afar; it offered a pale blank of mist and cloud; near a scene of wet
lawn and storm…beat shrub; with ceaseless rain sweeping away wildly
before a long and lamentable blast。
I returned to my book… Bewick's History of British Birds: the
letterpress thereof I cared little for; generally speaking; and yet
there were certain introductory pages that; child as I was; I could
not pass quite as a blank。 They were those which treat of the haunts
of sea…fowl; of 'the solitary rocks and promontories' by them only
inhabited; of the coast of Norway; studded with isles from its
southern extremity; the Lindeness; or Naze; to the North Cape…
'Where the Northern Ocean; in vast whirls;
Boils round the naked; melancholy isles
Of farthest Thule; and the Atlantic surge
Pours in among the stormy Hebrides。'
Nor could I pass unnoticed the suggestion of the bleak shores of
Lapland; Siberia; Spitzbergen; Nova Zembla; Iceland; Greenland; with
'the vast sweep of the Arctic Zone; and those forlorn regions of
dreary space;… that reservoir of frost and snow; where firm fields
of ice; the accumulation of centuries of winters; glazed in Alpine
heights above heights; surround the pole and concentre the
multiplied rigours of extreme cold。' Of these death…white realms I
formed an idea of my own: shadowy; like all the half…comprehended
notions that float dim through children's brains; but strangely
impressive。 The words in these introductory pages connected themselves
with the succeeding vignettes; and gave significance to the rock
standing up alone in a sea of billow and spray; to the broken boat
stranded on a desolate coast; to the cold and ghastly moon glancing
through bars of cloud at a wreck just sinking。
I cannot tell what sentiment haunted the quite solitary churchyard;
with its inscribed headstone; its gate; its two trees; its low
horizon; girdled by a broken wall; and its newly…risen crescent;
attesting the hour of eventide。
The two ships becalmed on a torpid sea; I believed to be marine
phantoms。
The fiend pinning down the thief's pack behind him; I passed over
quickly: it was an object of terror。
So was the black horned thing seated aloof on a rock; surveying a
distant crowd surrounding a gallows。
Each picture told a story; mysterious often to my undeveloped
understanding and imperfect feelings; yet ever profoundly interesting:
as interesting as the tales Bessie sometimes narrated on winter
evenings; when she chanced to be in good humour; and when; having
brought her ironing…table to the nursery hearth; she allowed us to sit
about it; and while she got up Mrs。 Reed's lace frills; and crimped
her nightcap borders; fed our eager attention with passages of love
and adventure taken from old fairy tales and other ballads; or (as
at a later period I discovered) from the pages of Pamela; and Henry;
Earl of Moreland。
With Bewick on my knee; I was then happy: happy at least in my way。
I feared nothing but interruption; and that came too soon。 The
breakfast…room door opened。
'Boh! Madam Mope!' cried the voice of John Reed; then he paused: he
found the room apparently empty。
'Where the dickens is she!' he continued。 'Lizzy! Georgy!
(calling to his sisters) Joan is not here: tell mama she is run out
into the rain… bad animal!'
'It is well I drew the curtain;' thought I; and I wished
fervently he might not discover my hiding…place: nor would John Reed
have found it out himself; he was not quick either of vision or
conception; but Eliza just put her head in at the door; and said at
once…
'She is in the window…seat; to be sure; Jack。'
And I came out immediately; for I trembled at the idea of being
dragged forth by the said Jack。
'What do you want?' I asked; with awkward diffidence。
'Say; 〃What do you want; Master Reed?〃' was the answer。 'I want you
to come here;' and seating himself in an armchair; he intimated by a
gesture that I was to approach and stand before him。
John Reed was a schoolboy of fourteen years old; four years older
than I; for I was but ten: large and stout for his age; with a dingy
and unwholesome skin; thick lineaments in a spacious visage; heavy
limbs and large extremities。 He gorged himself habitually at table;
which made him bilious; and gave him a dim and bleared eye and
flabby cheeks。 He ought now to have been at school; but his mama had
taken him home for a month or two; 'on account of his delicate
health。' Mr。 Miles; the master; affirmed that he would do very well if
he had fewer cakes and sweetmeats sent him from home; but the mother's
heart turned from an opinion so harsh; and inclined rather to the more
refined idea that John's sallowness was
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