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lavengro-第59部分
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became rather rare; and my father did not always communicate their
contents。 His last letter; however; had filled him and our whole
little family with joy; it was dated from Paris; and the writer was
evidently in high spirits。 After describing in eloquent terms the
beauties and gaieties of the French capital; he informed us how he
had plenty of money; having copied a celebrated picture of one of
the Italian masters for a Hungarian nobleman; for which he had
received a large sum。 'He wishes me to go with him to Italy;'
added he; 'but I am fond of independence; and; if ever I visit old
Rome; I will have no patrons near me to distract my attention。'
But six months had now elapsed from the date of this letter; and we
had heard no further intelligence of my brother。 My father's
complaint increased; the gout; his principal enemy; occasionally
mounted high up in his system; and we had considerable difficulty
in keeping it from the stomach; where it generally proves fatal。 I
now devoted almost the whole of my time to my father; on whom his
faithful partner also lavished every attention and care。 I read
the Bible to him; which was his chief delight; and also
occasionally such other books as I thought might prove entertaining
to him。 His spirits were generally rather depressed。 The absence
of my brother appeared to prey upon his mind。 'I wish he were
here;' he would frequently exclaim; 'I can't imagine what can have
become of him; I trust; however; he will arrive in time。' He still
sometimes rallied; and I took advantage of those moments of
comparative ease to question him upon the events of his early life。
My attentions to him had not passed unnoticed; and he was kind;
fatherly; and unreserved。 I had never known my father so
entertaining as at these moments; when his life was but too
evidently drawing to a close。 I had no idea that he knew and had
seen so much; my respect for him increased; and I looked upon him
almost with admiration。 His anecdotes were in general highly
curious; some of them related to people in the highest stations;
and to men whose names were closely connected with some of the
brightest glories of our native land。 He had frequently conversed
… almost on terms of familiarity … with good old George。 He had
known the conqueror of Tippoo Saib; and was the friend of
Townshend; who; when Wolfe fell; led the British grenadiers against
the shrinking regiments of Montcalm。 'Pity;' he added; 'that when
old … old as I am now … he should have driven his own son mad by
robbing him of his plighted bride; but so it was; he married his
son's bride。 I saw him lead her to the altar; if ever there was an
angelic countenance; it was that girl's; she was almost too fair to
be one of the daughters of women。 Is there anything; boy; that you
would wish to ask me? now is the time。'
'Yes; father; there is one about whom I would fain question you。'
'Who is it? shall I tell you about Elliot?'
'No; father; not about Elliot; but pray don't be angry; I should
like to know something about Big Ben。'
'You are a strange lad;' said my father; 'and; though of late I
have begun to entertain a more favourable opinion than heretofore;
there is still much about you that I do not understand。 Why do you
bring up that name? Don't you know that it is one of my
temptations: you wish to know something about him。 Well! I will
oblige you this once; and then farewell to such vanities …
something about him。 I will tell you … his … skin when he flung
off his clothes … and he had a particular knack in doing so … his
skin; when he bared his mighty chest and back for combat; and when
he fought he stood; so 。 。 。 。 if I remember right … his skin; I
say; was brown and dusky as that of a toad。 Oh me! I wish my
elder son was here。'
CHAPTER XXVIII
My brother's arrival … The interview … Night … A dying father …
Christ。
AT last my brother arrived; he looked pale and unwell; I met him at
the door。 'You have been long absent;' said I。
'Yes;' said he; 'perhaps too long; but how is my father?'
'Very poorly;' said I; 'he has had a fresh attack; but where have
you been of late?'
'Far and wide;' said my brother; 'but I can't tell you anything
now; I must go to my father。 It was only by chance that I heard of
his illness。'
'Stay a moment;' said I。 'Is the world such a fine place as you
supposed it to be before you went away?'
'Not quite;' said my brother; 'not quite; indeed I wish … but ask
me no questions now; I must hasten to my father。' There was
another question on my tongue; but I forbore; for the eyes of the
young man were full of tears。 I pointed with my finger; and the
young man hastened past me to the arms of his father。
I forbore to ask my brother whether he had been to old Rome。
What passed between my father and brother I do not know; the
interview; no doubt; was tender enough; for they tenderly loved
each other; but my brother's arrival did not produce the beneficial
effect upon my father which I at first hoped it would; it did not
even appear to have raised his spirits。 He was composed enough;
however: 'I ought to be grateful;' said he; 'I wished to see my
son; and God has granted me my wish; what more have I to do now
than to bless my little family and go?'
My father's end was evidently at hand。
And did I shed no tears? did I breathe no sighs? did I never wring
my hands at this period? the reader will perhaps be asking。
Whatever I did and thought is best known to God and myself; but it
will be as well to observe; that it is possible to feel deeply; and
yet make no outward sign。
And now for the closing scene。
At the dead hour of night; it might be about two; I was awakened
from sleep by a cry which sounded from the room immediately below
that in which I slept。 I knew the cry; it was the cry of my
mother; and I also knew its import; yet I made no effort to rise;
for I was for the moment paralysed。 Again the cry sounded; yet
still I lay motionless … the stupidity of horror was upon me。 A
third time; and it was then that; by a violent effort; bursting the
spell which appeared to bind me; I sprang from the bed and rushed
downstairs。 My mother was running wildly about the room; she had
awoke; and found my father senseless in the bed by her side。 I
essayed to raise him; and after a few efforts supported him in the
bed in a sitting posture。 My brother now rushed in; and; snatching
up a light that was burning; he held it to my father's face。 'The
surgeon; the surgeon!' he cried; then; dropping the light; he ran
out of the room followed by my mother; I remained alone; supporting
the senseless form of my father; the light had been extinguished by
the fall; and an almost total darkness reigned in the room。 The
form pressed heavily again
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