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the professor at the breakfast table-第70部分

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〃slap his chops。〃 Let 'em alone; said young Maryland;it 'll soon

be over; and they won't hurt each other much。 So they went out。



The Koh…i…noor entertained the very common idea; that; when one

quarrels with another; the simple thing to do is to knock the man

down; and there is the end of it。  Now those who have watched such

encounters are aware of two things: first; that it is not so easy to

knock a man down as it is to talk about it; secondly; that; if you

do happen to knock a man down; there is a very good chance that he

will be angry; and get up and give you a thrashing。



So the Koh…i…noor thought he would begin; as soon as they got into

the yard; by knocking his man down; and with this intention swung

his arm round after the fashion of rustics and those unskilled in

the noble art; expecting the young fellow John to drop when his

fist; having completed a quarter of a circle; should come in contact

with the side of that young man's head。  Unfortunately for this

theory; it happens that a blow struck out straight is as much

shorter; and therefore as much quicker than the rustic's swinging

blow; as the radius is shorter than the quarter of a circle。  The

mathematical and mechanical corollary was; that the Koh…i…noor felt

something hard bring up suddenly against his right eye; which

something he could have sworn was a paving…stone; judging by his

sensations; and as this threw his person somewhat backwards; and the

young man John jerked his own head back a little; the swinging blow

had nothing to stop it; and as the Jewel staggered between the hit

he got and the blow he missed; he tripped and 〃went to grass;〃 so

far as the back…yard of our boardinghouse was provided with that

vegetable。  It was a signal illustration of that fatal mistake; so

frequent in young and ardent natures with inconspicuous calves and

negative pectorals; that they can settle most little quarrels on the

spot by 〃knocking the man down。〃



We are in the habit of handling our faces so carefully; that a heavy

blow; taking effect on that portion of the surface; produces a most

unpleasant surprise; which is accompanied with odd sensations; as of

seeing sparks; and a kind of electrical or ozone…like odor; half…

sulphurous in character; and which has given rise to a very vulgar

and profane threat sometimes heard from the lips of bullies。  A

person not used to pugilistic gestures does not instantly recover

from this surprise。  The Koh…i…noor exasperated by his failure; and

still a little confused by the smart hit he had received; but

furious; and confident of victory over a young fellow a good deal

lighter than himself; made a desperate rush to bear down all before

him and finish the contest at once。  That is the way all angry

greenhorns and incompetent persons attempt to settle matters。  It

does n't do; if the other fellow is only cool; moderately quick; and

has a very little science。  It didn't do this time; for; as the

assailant rushed in with his arms flying everywhere; like the vans

of a windmill; be ran a prominent feature of his face against a fist

which was travelling in the other direction; and immediately after

struck the knuckles of the young man's other fist a severe blow with

the part of his person known as the epigastrium to one branch of

science and the bread…basket to another。  This second round closed

the battle。  The Koh…i…noor had got enough; which in such cases is

more than as good as a feast。  The young fellow asked him if he was

satisfied; and held out his hand。  But the other sulked; and

muttered something about revenge。 Jest as ye like;said the young

man John。 Clap a slice o' raw beefsteak on to that mouse o' yours

'n' 't'll take down the swellin'。  (Mouse is a technical term for a

bluish; oblong; rounded elevation occasioned by running one's

forehead or eyebrow against another's knuckles。) The young fellow

was particularly pleased that he had had an opportunity of trying

his proficiency in the art of self…defence without the gloves。  The

Koh…i…noor did not favor us with his company for a day or two; being

confined to his chamber; it was said; by a slight feverish; attack。

He was chop…fallen always after this; and got negligent in his

person。  The impression must have been a deep one; for it was

observed; that; when he came down again; his moustache and whiskers

had turned visibly white about the roots。  In short; it disgraced

him; and rendered still more conspicuous a tendency to drinking; of

which he had been for some time suspected。  This; and the disgust

which a young lady naturally feels at hearing that her lover has

been 〃licked by a fellah not half his size;〃 induced the landlady's

daughter to take that decided step which produced a change in the

programme of her career I may hereafter allude to。



I never thought he would come to good; when I heard him attempting

to sneer at an unoffending city so respectable as Boston。  After a

man begins to attack the State…House; when he gets bitter about the

Frog…Pond; you may be sure there is not much left of him。  Poor

Edgar Poe died in the hospital soon after he got into this way of

talking; and so sure as you find an unfortunate fellow reduced to

this pass; you had better begin praying for him; and stop lending

him money; for he is on his last legs。  Remember poor Edgar!  He is

dead and gone; but the State…House has its cupola fresh…gilded; and

the Frog…Pond has got a fountain that squirts up a hundred feet into

the air and glorifies that humble sheet with a fine display of

provincial rainbows。



I cannot fulfil my promise in this number。  I expected to gratify

your curiosity; if you have become at all interested in these

puzzles; doubts; fancies; whims; or whatever you choose to call

them; of mine。  Next month you shall hear all about it。



It was evening; and I was going to the sick…chamber。  As I paused

at the door before entering; I heard a sweet voice singing。  It was

not the wild melody I had sometimes heard at midnight:no; this was

the voice of Iris; and I could distinguish every word。  I had seen

the verses in her book; the melody was new to me。  Let me finish my

page with them。





          HYMN OF TRUST。



O Love Divine; that stooped to share

Our sharpest pang; our bitterest tear;

On Thee we cast each earthborn care;

We smile at pain while Thou art near!



Though long the weary way we tread;

And sorrow crown each lingering year;

No path we shun; no darkness dread;

Our hearts still whispering; Thou art near!



When drooping pleasure turns to grief;

And trembling faith is changed to fear;

The murmuring wind; the quivering leaf

Shall softly tell us; Thou art near!



On Thee we fling our burdening woe;

O Love Divine; forever dear;

Content to suffer; while we know;

Living and dying; Thou art near!









XII



A young fellow; born of good stock; in one of the more thoroughly

civilized portions of these United States o
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